Putting the " UR A Man" and "Ic!" in "Manicure!"

On Tuesday, I got a manicure from a man.

I have been getting my nails done every two weeks since I was 16, and only twice have I had a man do the task. The first was a cell phone ear-piece-wearing long-haired cheeseball who handled my hands as though they were piping hot crabs. The second man is the one I would like to discuss in this entry. For context, this guy was part of a nail duo-- girl on feet, man on hands.

I like when women do my nails. They have soft hands and they always praise the color I pick out. They smile and ask me if I have plans that night (I never do, but sometimes I lie. I once told Tchau at a Capitol Hill salon that I was going to a ball). Women manicurists make me feel very special. I really liked the woman who did my pedicure on Tuesday, mostly because she distracted me from the butchering that was going on on my hands. Mr. I-wear-a-gold-chain-and-am-flirting-with-the-receptionist managed to make 4 of my cuticles bleed from aggressive cutting and from neglecting to put my hands in warm water (oh no he deh-ennnnnt!!!!). This GUY not only rushed me into signing the bill with wet hands, but didn't even MENTION how pretty my color was!

I know many wonderful men in my life, but not one would I ever trust for my personal grooming. Their hands are hard and they have no interest in balls that I may or may not be attending that evening. I'm sorry if this is all sexist, but YOU try cleaning countertops with 409-vulnerable cuticles!